#975 – Gripped
Posted on March 8, 2010 at 12:00 am by Chris
Chapter: Comics
When I was around 7 or 8 years old my little brother threw a teddy bear. I happened to be drinking a glass of milk at the moment. A glass of milk that I was finishing just in time to look through the bottom of the glass and see the distorted image of a teddy bear flying at my head. It has been a few decades since I got that swollen lip. I have yet to get my revenge.
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I want to say “Revenge is a glass of milk best served cold”, but that doesn’t make any sense…and besides, I think that any statute of limitations on the “crime” has probably expired.
What’s the number to call him over? I got a a real stubborn jar.
(Okay I just wanna meet Biff)
@Matt Lee
You may want to wait until another time to shake his hand though 😀
Yet another comic I’m not “getting”… Maybe my humor is just off this month.
@Tjovian – biff has some sort of infection that has caused his hands to be way bigger than they are supposed to be. Therefore, Biff is using his newfound enhancement to help the little people by opening jars, as oversized hands would be perfect for such work.
Maybe he could fill in once in awhile for Bongo Bongo in Legend of Zeldas Ocarina of Time then too 😛
Oh! I thought the big hands was just a perspective thing. Hrm.
When I was a child, I had a fever!
“Life is a river. Time is a journey. The door is a jar.” –Harry Dresden
@Micah: I think that’s more a perspective thing.
Rex, I agree. Believe me, there are times when I get my cluster headaches and my wife runs me to the ER, I’m very glad to hear to hear:
‘OK, just a little pinprick, there’ll be no more “AHH-AHH-AHHH”, but you may feel a little sick.’
Once I am comfortably numb, life is good.
I was once stung by a cicada-killer wasp… Had the same effect, but only on the one hand. 😛
Biff, however, went into the demolition business, destroying many buildings with his mighty, hefty hands.
@Doctor Why:
Me too. Yay for the comments section!
Just yesterday, I tried to open a container of juice (it was POM wonderful) and couldn’t do it. I tried until I got blisters. I ended up spending about an hour slowly puncturing a hole in the top with thumbtacks, then widening it with scissors. Then after all that, the juice was slightly disappointing.
What is the point of making juice containers which are impossible to open with human hands?
Sick amusement, what else?
All you need to open a stuck jar lid is the handle of a knife and a few well-aimed blows.
Never met a jar I couldn’t open with this trick.
Or get a special grip cloth that works just as well. They’re out there. My mom got me one.