#916 – Creased
Posted on December 15, 2009 at 12:00 am by Chris
Chapter: Comics
Other things that are frowned upon in art museums: cooking french fries, water balloon fights, spontaneous combustion, archery, monster truck rallys.
TagsOther things that are frowned upon in art museums: cooking french fries, water balloon fights, spontaneous combustion, archery, monster truck rallys.
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Archery is not allowed? Guess I won’t be going…
The Mona Lisa is smiling because she knows her canvas would make the most perfectly weighted paper airplane ever, by the way. Little-known fact.
On that same note, they also don’t take too kindly to origami in art museums.
Nor liver transplantations, or birth giving.
Nor motocross, or beekeeping.
Yeah, art museums are such dour places. Looks like we’re in for a week of paper comics.
It’s still art, its just no longer useless
Last art museum I went to years back, was Terry Redlin Art Center in Watertown, SD. My sister had said that it looked like Montana Max’s mansion from Tiny Toon Adventures.
You could see it right off of Interstate 29 and it was located south of McDonald’s.
http://www.redlinart.com/
I live in Aberdeen, SD btw.
Paper Machete is faux pas in an art museum, too.
You can’t grow crops in an art museum, or raise livestock, or play reindeer games. Caroling might be approved, however. Check with your local curator.
I am sad to say that scuba diving is also prohibited in art museums.
Although I hate to burst a bubble, the Mona Lisa is not painted on a canvas that you can roll up like a piece of paper. It can’t bend, and it’s not due to age!
I am sure they don’t allow cutting of holiday ornaments or paper snowflakes in museums either, however.
Boiling lobsters, Pumpkin carving and Fox hunts are also on the no list.
@billy – I first read your comment as “fox carving” and was really disturbed.
@Micah – I want a paper machete 🙁
Do art museums allow skydiving these days?
@Chris – I’m pretty sure they don’t allow that either.
@Beege – Man, talk about paper cuts…
Running thru the museum in the nude is not allowed, even if they had the statue of David there.
you forgot the most important one: pyromaniac conventions
Tennis and Basketball are frowned upon, and WWF-style wrestling is *right* out. Also, flamethrowers and skeet-shooting are highly restricted.
@Metal Matt, ZeoViolet is correct – The Mona Lisa is painted on wood. You could still make an airplane out of it, but it wouldn’t be paper.
They also dont allow Biffs Invisible green car ever since that incident with the library a few years ago.
@MaskedMan – I suppose the Mona Lisa would have to be ground up an turned into some sort of pulp and then made into paper… then an airplane!
Fire eating and running with scissors are also not allowed. I had to call my local art museuem for these three, but it also turns out that food fights, high explosives, and spelunking are also on the “no” list.
It’s paper week Isn’t it?
@ Church: I just thought that.
I think live dinosaurs are not allowed in museums either.
Does that mean you are safe from spontaneous combustion at a museum?
The #1 thing frowned upon in art museums these days seems to be talent…
@Grug:That depends on the type of crops, if you give them any, and how much you give them.
I don’t think I’ve ever been to an art museum…. (ponders)
@Chris; I suppose, if you were willing to got the effort. Which I suppose Biff would. But it’s a high waste process; you’d get a very small sheet of paper. 😛
@Kharn; Amen. 🙁
@Random unless its Jurassic Park, then run like hell.
@ Kharn
That is the truth.
D’oh. I got pwned. I was unaware that the Mona Lisa wasn’t painted on canvas lol
@ MetalMatt; It is, but the old kind of canvas that has more in common with a tablecloth than a pasteboard. Makes me think of a range of very expensive tableware…