#254 – Spider

My wife is crazy scared of spiders. One time she called me at work because she was convinced there was a black widow in our bathtub. I told her I would get rid of it when I got home but she couldn’t stand the idea of it being in the house with her. She got a can of lysol and practically emptied it onto the little arachnid and left it to die. Of course when I got home it looked nothing like a black widow… but don’t try and tell her that. πŸ™‚


88 thoughts on “#254 – Spider”

  1. Greensong says:

    i was bitten by a spider once

    now i fight crime

    no joke.

  2. Bob says:

    i freaking hate spiders of any kind

  3. geeklord says:

    I’m not afraid of spiders, but I can see how
    a vacuum that powerful could be useful.

  4. Andy says:

    I love spiders. Not so much that I’ll pick them up, but enough that I’d rather catch it in a clear container, look at it for a little while, and then let it go outside.

    If his vacuum is that powerful, I would think he’d have problems when he tries cleaning his house…

  5. Heinrich says:

    That’s an awesome vacuum.

  6. Jerowaka says:

    i love spiders, they catch mosquitos so i wont have to

    1. extremist343 says:

      I hate spiders, they’re creepy and I’m mosquito proof anyway, so I never have to worry about them.

  7. Q says:

    I hate spiders, I’m allergic.

    So I am extremely scared of them, I could die if one bit me. I would get along great with your wife, I’ve pulled the same move.

  8. TsukiNoBara says:

    I’d love to have that vacuum if all the spiders in my house stayed somewhere other than the ceiling. All of them stay up there, just beyond the reach of anything I could use to kill them. My parents insist daddy long-legs are good spiders, but the only good spider is either far away from me or dead.

    Interestingly, my mother actually caught a black widow in a jar about three weeks ago. Had the hourglass and everything. It was still alive when we gave it to the bugman this Tuesday. Though, judging on how fast it pounced on the last bug I pushed through the air hole, it was probably hungry.

  9. Steven says:

    Yeah, Biff reminds me of my Dad like this. He is terrified. If he knows there is one in the ouse he leaves ’till I get rid of it. Especially if it is a redback. Oh the fun I have….

  10. cyber95 says:

    Biff, if you’ve got such a powerful vaccuum, you should just suck up the spider from across the room.

  11. Eleanor says:

    I think having it flying towards him defeats the “Spiders are scary” bit of the comic.
    Still, he can now use the vacuum to slide around the ceiling, he pushes of from one wall and has a lot of fun whizzing around.

  12. RFPT says:

    Eleanor, that’s an awesome idea.

  13. CojoinedCows says:

    Damn spiders. Both my little brother and I are really scared by them, so when we had a spider at the house, we usually hid behind the sofa or something while my little sister got rid of it. Not very manly… πŸ˜‰

  14. Hehe the rant was great today. I cant say I dont enjoy using a butload of chemicals on small insect for no reason, its fun to watch ’em SQUIRM

  15. Marcus Dranz says:

    Actually, Tsuki, Daddy Long Legs aren’t spiders at all. They lack the combined head and thorax that characterizes arachnids. DLLs, well, they just look like someone got lazy, jammed hairs into a ball of clay, and said, ‘Done.’ Don’t ask me what they ARE, though. I have no freakin’ idea.

    And, speaking of allergies, I like spiders because they catch the flying, stinging things I’M allergic to. Not EAT, mind you, just catch. They, like Blargen, apparently, like to watch them squirm.

    And, just yesterday, I saw a HUGE freakin’ spider. Must’ve been the size of a dime. And I did what I usually do when confronted with a monstrous arachnid: I prodded it lightly with the mechanical pencil in my pocket to watch it move. It was AWESOME.

  16. Marcus Dranz says:

    …Yeah, I’m a nerd.

  17. Ribosome says:

    I like spiders, I have a tarantula ^^

  18. dragonbrad says:

    I have been terified by spiders most of my life, I can thank my mom for that, she told me that some spiders can kill you, and i saw the movie Arachnaphobia, scared the crap out of me.

    Yo, marcus dranz, i can top the biggest spider, well were i live almost everybody has a hamok, and one afternoon i was laying on the hamok, and a red-kneed tarantula the size of a poker chip crawled right on my hand, oh, scared the crap out of me!

    And thats why i never go in the attic.

  19. Gobbledegook says:

    once when I was about 16 my little brother accidentally dropped a tennis ball down a storm drain. When we got the manhole off and looked in to find it, the walls looked like they were moving because there were so many spiders down there.
    We ended up shooting at them with a bb gun for about half an hour, but ran away screaming when they started pouring out of the manhole to escape.

  20. Wannabeelf says:

    spiders are icky. i usually runaway from them. a couple weeks ago there was on in my bathroom watching me take a shower from just above the tile on the wall. i kept splashing water in its general direction (I’m a bad shot and was temporarily blind as i don’t wear my glasses in the shower) and telling it to get away. the next day i found it laying dead on the rim of the tub. i turned on the tap and splashed water at it to wash it down the drain.

    then earlier this week, my dad came home to find a big black one with thick legs covered in white fur (the worst kind) on the living room floor and squished it with a paper towel. he then brought it upstairs to show me an d my mother. he shoved it in my face while i was trapped in a corner and i said, “getitawaygetitawaygetitawaygetitaway!”

    i used to not be as afraid of spiders as i am now. i used to not be afraid of spiders at all, then my parents took us to see arachnophobia. i was only afraid of the ones with the thick, hairy legs for a while after that, but now I’m scared of them all. oddly enough, i had a friend in high school who had a pet black widow which he pulled out of his hat one day and let walk around my basement floor and i wasn’t afraid of it–i wasn’t dumb enough to get anywhere near it, but i wasn’t afraid like i am now. by the way, he breed the widow and then brought the babies to school in a little case–he got suspended for that. black widow babies are light brown in color and if you look closely at them you can see a lighter brown hourglass on their backs.

  21. Andy says:

    Marcus — I checked Wikipedia. There’s 3 bugs that are called Daddy Long Legs, and 2 of them are arachnids. Amusingly enough, only one is a spider. The harvestman (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Opiliones) isn’t a spider, but the cellar spider (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daddy_long-legs_spider) is.

    My biology teacher from high school has a black widow in a small cage in his classroom. As well as a tarantula. I prefer to blow on the spider and make them move that way. Just in case it’s gonna bite or something.

  22. Oddly Frozen says:

    one time i was trying to plan my birthday party with my friend gabby, it was a movie party and we wanted to show a scary movie but we couldn’t think of any. I suggested arachnophobia and she said “whats that?” i told her it meant the fear of spiders, I swear she practically jumped onto the ceiling screaming “OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD I HATE SPIDERS!!!!!!!!” when she came down she said “ya, sounds good” heh, good times, good times =P

  23. Seraphine says:

    A spider bit me under the eye once. My eye was swollen shut. I still have a scar and a knot where she bit me.

  24. Reikon Ame says:

    I got more laughs out of the stories of people afraid of spiders, then the comic itself……..nuff said.

  25. Elli says:

    I once got a catalogue from National Geographic, and it had remote control tarantulas. All seven legs move individually so they look real. I want to get them, but I might give poor Tsuki a heart attack.

  26. Marcus Dranz says:


  27. P. Reaper says:

    That can’t be that usefull since spiders can climb walls. D:

  28. trueblaze says:

    About a year or two ago, I was helping my dad move some boxes out of the upstairs bed room. We were almost done when I moved one of the boxes and here on the other side was a big old spider clinging to the box, it had to be at least the size of a silver dollar if not bigger. Anyway, spiders freak me out (I too think I got my fear from watching Arachnophobia when I was a kid) so I jumped back and told my sister there was a huge spider on the other side of the box.

    So she walks over not really expecting it to be all that big. Now it was on the back of the box so to see it she had to grab the box and pull it slightly, and just her luck she put her hand about two inches away from where it was sitting. When she finally spotted it and realized her hand was right next to it she freaked and dropped the box slightly causing the spider to quickly climb off and start walking across the floor.

    Now we’re both a little freaked, but it’s still cool looking so we watch it as we call our dad and my brother up there as well. So my dad comes up and grabs a bottle of Raid and begins spraying the hell out of it, and all it does is sit there grooming itself. So since the Raid didn’t work, my dad just took his boot and stepped on it. Then my brother spent the next ten minutes grabbing me from behind when I wasn’t expecting it and yelling BRAA to freak me out even more. (we kept the spider after we killed it and later found out it was a baby tarancula of some kind)

    So after that I decide I can’t work up stairs anymore thanks to my brother freaking me out even more than I already was. So where does my dad send me? Out to the gerage, aka, spider centeral 0_0. Small spiders don’t usually bother me, but thanks to my brother I was already jumpy enough I could barly grab any of the boxes out there for fear there was another huge spider on the other side.

    By the time the day was over I was glad to be back at my apartment. So I open the door, and low and behold, here my cat is chasing a quarter sized spider across the living room floor O_O. I grabbed a cleannex and squished it and flushed it, but I was litterally shaking for the rest of the night and constantly glancing around just waiting for another one to pop out from some where.

  29. dragonbrad says:

    if i have a spider in my house, my cat will eat it

  30. Kadro says:

    I was at a camp a while ago and I saw a spider about the size of a quarter around… not including the legs

  31. Jordan says:

    I love spiders! There’s a cute little one sitting on my wall right now, crawling around. Actually… It’s not all that little. She’s one of those awesome ones that catches flies and wasps and stuff, so I don’t mind her.

  32. metalhead says:

    And then Biff falls and his head lands next to the spider. Then he runs to the garage, gets the apache he used to mow his lawn, and hits that spider with a dumb-fire missle.

  33. Salazar says:

    When I was, oh…about 10 or 12, I had a large quarter sized spider that lived in the window by my bed, and when I was laying down it was almost right over my face. I named it Ron and enjoyed the fact that it ate any other bugs that entered my room. For all I know it crawled in my mouth every night as I slept (thank heaves I was sleeping). I got pretty attatched to it. Then my Dad noticed Ron and sucked it up with a vacuum cleaner… I was a sad panda.

    Biff needs a spider-catching attatchment to go with his PowerVac

  34. Elli says:

    Eight legs. Sorry. I had a brain fart. XD

  35. Mint Sharpie says:

    I like laughing at people who are scared of spiders. Back at summer camp a couple years ago I was the Official Cabin Exterminator. Nobody else could stand to touch any sort of bug at all. Why they were at camp, I don’t know. But I’d pick up whatever they were pointing and screaming at, then chase them around with it. Until the novelty ran out. Then I came up with creative ways of disposing of said insectoids.

  36. Lisa says:

    Spiders are cool. I like all spiders except for Daddy Long Legs (if they are spiders, but whatever). Tarantulas are cool.

    Oh but I can beat all your ‘really big spider’ stories with ease – I once saw one that would have been literally 10 inches across (counting the legs, that is). It was a Huntsman Spider. My friend saw it too, she’ll back me up. We ran full speed down two flights of stairs to get away from it.

    On another note, where can I buy one of those Vacuums for my mum?

  37. Pixilated says:

    A quick spider fact, you’ll eat on average 7 spiders in your sleep.

  38. Wannabeelf says:

    gee, thanks for sharing.

    now where’s my surgical mask?

  39. Jason says:

    i hope thats 7 in a lifetime ._.

  40. Wannabeelf says:

    re: huntsman spider

    that’s probably the ickiest spider I’ve ever seen. just the picture of it made me get a mild panic attack (for people with arachnophobia, the mere sight of a spider causes panic attacks) but “Australian Huntsman spiders belong to the Family Sparassidae (formerly Heteropodidae) and are famed as being the hairy so-called ‘tarantulas’ on house walls that terrify people by scuttling out from behind curtains. In fact, they are a diverse and relatively harmless group of spiders, with 13 genera and 94 described species. ” while, as i recall (the first two sites i visited couldn’t back this up and I’m unwilling to subject myself to further panic attacks by studying spiders on websites sporting far too many photos, at least, not right now), the black widow is the third deadliest spider in the world. another spider native to my corner of the world, the brown recluse–which I’ve also been far closer to than i would have liked–is the second. tell me you’ve been within two feet of an Australian wolf spider (number 1 according to my recollection of elementary school teachings)without a glass wall between you and i will be–for lack of a better term–impressed.

    for people who would belittle me for admitting to my fear, know that i am a highly intelligent person (i have a genius level I.Q.–note that a genius level I.Q. does not a genius make), i am not afraid of knowledge, and i am willing to study spiders–in small chunks of my time or if there aren’t any pictures. Nor am i ashamed to admit to my fear. logically, i know that most spiders are harmless to humans, but logic cannot overcome emotion and instinct–logic does not apply in the heat of the moment. as i said, i have no better explanation for my fear of spiders other than “they’re icky.” i know they are very useful and important creatures, but that doesn’t matter. arachnophobia is an eerily hominid primal urge to either kill or flee from a potentially dangerous creature. also, stereotypes ate stereotypes because there is a kernel of truth in them. arachnophobia is often associated with female “weakness,” i believe this is because women (in general) are more attuned to nature and therefore instinct (which i consider strength–i know it has been for me).

    Mint Sharpie, you’re lucky you didn’t give anyone a heart attack. with my family’s history of heart disease, you probably would have me. panic attacks are nothing to be trifled with and nothing to be controlled. it doesn’t mean that the person having them doesn’t enjoy nature or isn’t capable of taking care of them self, it’s just a hold over from early humans.

    those who laugh at other people’s fears, are usually ashamed to admit their own.

  41. Wannabeelf says:

    relatively harmless group of spiders, with 13 genera and 94 described species. is suposed to be underlined and the site i coppied that from didn’t show up.


  42. Wannabeelf says:

    eerily is suposed to be early

  43. SpriteMeister says:

    Can’t the spider just climb up the cord, though? Biff needs a wireless vacuum. (Whee! First time posting!)

  44. Squall says:

    I disagree, wannabeelf. Spiders are useless…USELESS I SAY. Stupid fumnuddling with their eight legs and their business-headed eight eyes. YEAH 8 eyes! WHO ARE THEY LOOKING AT? Me? Across the room? Looking for something to smush them with? Yes? No? Stupid rizzafrazzle pollymorking hypoemphatic communist arachnadummies! And that will be my nonsensical rant for today. PS. I like the way Lisa said “mum” in her post. British people are cool.
    As for Biff, well, while I also have a fear of spiders, its more of a, “I gotta kill you so you don’t get near me ever again” kinda way rather than a running screaming kind. You can’t let your vacuum solve all your problems, my friend. Thats how the Matrix got started.

  45. Squall says:

    Oh yeah, and wireless vacuum? Do they have those? Give me a 3D suctioning vacuum instead, it would be way cooler, though it wouldn’t live up to the hype.

  46. Malachite Dragon says:

    Spider bit me when I was little, once. T_T
    I dont trust anything with more then 4 legs anymore.

  47. Brett says:

    Spiders are cool, and freaky!

    Double Bonus!

  48. Whiteboy says:

    I have one of those cyclonic vacuums, with the clear case, sometimes I make a full event of sucking up spiders with it and watching them spin in the case. Creepy? Most satisfying thing ever? Mostly both.

  49. Arctic Fox says:

    lol i hate spiders, >.> but then if you were to wake up with your brothers friends HUGE, i mean freaking fist sized tarantula on your face, when your 5 you would hate them too.
    Now i just shoot them with my shotgun, or if its indoors i use a can of hair spray and a lighter to kill them ^^ tis always fun to burn them, they burn almost as well as Texas “horse moths” hehe they done gone and burned really bright and perty (forgive the red neck impression there lol)

  50. red rule says:

    Can’t the spider just climb up the cord, though? Biff needs a wireless vacuum. (Whee! First time posting!)

    yeh but then the spider will call his friends and they sit under him until the energy runs out
    it’s a nuclear powered vacuum then the’ll climb up the walls and down the vacuum onto biff
    its a sucking/propelling vacuum which makes him hover, then they will drop down from there spider ninjaish wires from the ceiling
    his vacuum generates a spider repelling force field.

    so the moral of this story, biff has again not been thinking before he bargains something >,

  51. red rule says:

    aaaah par of my post missing!!!

    …before he bargain something >,

  52. red rule says:



    i still meant to say that luckily where i live we have no deadly spiders and only 1 species of snakes that CAN(but mostly not) kill

  53. Spoot Knight says:

    Yeah, I think it was seven spiders in your lifetime, if not, then a year.
    I’d use that vaccum for de-facing purposes. πŸ˜€
    And Arctic Fox…keep doing that and you’ll end up like the German woman who burnt her entire house to the ground with that can and lighter… 😐

  54. Chris says:

    Since some of you are trying hold a conversation in the comments here I decided to install a proper forum. http://www.thebookofbiff.com/forum

  55. Synchro says:

    So is he sucking up the spider on the ceiling, or if he getting off the floor where the spider is?

    Well, at least we know how he gets around his home now, what with the floor being lava in that one room.

  56. Seraphine says:

    Spider is great, Chris. Biff touched a nerve and got lots of comments. I love your comic.

  57. Ryan says:

    That’s such a stupid myth.

    Q. Do spiders crawl in my mouth and nose while I am sleeping?
    A. I think it would be highly unlikely that spiders would crawl into a person’s mouth or nose while they sleeping. For one thing we move around a lot while we are sleeping and this would deter a spider from even crawling on you, let alone enter any orifice, especially one which is wet and dark. Breathing through your mouth or nose would also deter a spider from entering and most house spiders are too big to fit into a nose in any case. Spiders, like virtually all arthropods, flee from breath. After all, there are lots of vertebrates that eat arthropods, and if you’re an arthropod and something is breathing on you, it’s not a good idea to stick around.

    For a spider to get into your mouth while you’re sleeping, (a) you must have your mouth open when you sleep, which is certainly not something that everyone odes, so there’s a big chunk of people who can never swallow anything; (b) there has to be a wandering spider in your immediate vicinity, also something which–for most people in the civilized world, at least–is a fairly rare occurrence; (c) the spider has to either jump or fall into your mouth from a long distance, because they won’t go near your mouth otherwise (they’re not suicidal), and the odds are pretty astronomical of a spider randomly dropping into your mouth from the ceiling.

    There is a story about humans eating eight spiders a year in our sleep without knowing it and that it was supposedly tested by filming people in their sleep for a year. It is hard to believe that a group of people in different sleeping situations would have been filmed for a year or more to validate this statement. It is possible for a spider to walk into your mouth and trigger the swallowing mechanism at the back of the throat and this could in fact occur on a rare occasion. It may even be true that there are a few people out there who have unknowingly eaten eight spiders in the last twelve months. This still would not make such a generalisation be considered as true. I certainly wouldn’t lose any sleep worrying about spiders while you sleep!!


  58. DKat says:

    i love the fact that your wife called you while you were at work.

    my older sister called me at work once when our parents were away because of a spider on the celing. i ended up wasting my entire 30 minute meal break trying to convince her that there was nothing i could do until i got home. next thing i know, she decided to come visit me at work because she couldn’t stand to be in the house with it. unlike your wife, she wasn’t even brave enough to attack it with.

    i will admit though, it was a rather large spider.

  59. Knife Knut says:

    My favorite is the jumping spiders.

  60. Myou says:

    I can top most of the large spider stories. There are these spiders down here in Florida “Wood Spiders”. These are NASTY little things. VERY cranky and mean, they’ll actually JUMP at you! Anyways, there was one about the size of my open hand on my wall one day. I almost dies. I run screaming from tiny spiders, like the size of a thumbtack’s top. That think almost gave ME a heart attack!!!
    Btw, I LOVE the comic!

  61. Rachel says:

    so true

  62. Jeremy says:

    *spider unplugs vacuum*

  63. Ben says:

    Wow I love how most of the world is scared of spiders, but here in Aus, there are just so many of them.

    I had a funnel web in a jar next to my bed for a few months, there is a 10cm huntsman living somewhere near my shoes and I’m not sure what it is that lives in the curtain at the head of my bed.
    I wouldn’t want to be bitten by a funnel web, but other than that, they don’t worry me.

  64. Cybrina! says:

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! that is abnormally funny! I have no idea why. i laughed so loudly my dog got scared and ran away.

  65. Kamorth says:

    That’s really odd.

    When I was about 14, a bunch of white tail spiders ended up in my room (may have had something to do with a large collection of fossils and rocks and bits of wood that occupied my desk for a long time) and I got bitten at least 7 times. I ended up in hospital (much to my disgust, I was admitted the day before the Savage Garden concert I’d been looking forward to for around 6 months) to have a large lump of infected flesh removed from the back of my thigh, the result of the combination of one bite going particularly bad and contracting golden staph (Staphlococus Aureus, not sure of spelling) from an earlier trip to the hospital for one of the other bites.

    And I still have no fear of spiders. If it wasn’t illegal here, I would most definitely have a pet tarantula. Even white tails, even though they did cause me a lot of pain (I passed out halfway through the concert when the morphine they’d pumped me full of wore off.. they would have ended up dead in their beds if they hadn’t let me go) cause me no anxietly.. they just get picked up with a glass and a piece of paper and taken outside.

  66. Kamorth says:

    As I kid, I did manage to have a few Avondale spiders as pets.. they’re the ones they used on the movie Arachnaphobia.. but while they’re biggish, they’re not even a little bit poisonous.

  67. Arc says:

    Used to be scared of em as a kid, now i actually put those daddy long leg critters (if they ain’t spiders, then what? i dunno..) in my bedroom just to kill off the mosqito’s. For some reason, they seem to like it here enough to start breeding.
    That myth of eating spiders in your sleep would explain where they go when i can’t find em..

  68. Graceofbass says:

    That’s funny, because I use the vacuum to suck up spiders so I don’t have to get close to them. I have arachnophobia.

    So my husband’s parents own a farm, and when we were engaged I flew up to see him and stayed in the “cabin,” an old house that was already on the property when they bought it. They’ve added on to it and it’s habitable, but not pleasant for people who don’t like bugs, like me.

    One night we finished watching a movie and my then fiance went back to his parent’s house. It was late and I was tired, but I needed to go to the bathroom. I had been told to shake the towels before using them because spiders might get in them and I had seen spiders outside (they have a ton of what they call cat-face spiders that get HUGE) so I was careful. I checked the bathroom floor, walls, behind the toilet, everything was all clear. I sit down on the toilet, and then all of a sudden I see a gigantic wolf spider in the middle of the floor. I proceed to freak out (mostly because it was 2AM and I was already a little stressed because of wedding preparations) and managed to creep along the edge of the wall to the door. Note: this bathroom is only about 8 square feet. It’s teeny tiny.

    So I grab a bottle on special spider killer thats ays on the bottle “kills on contact”. It lied. I emptied about half of that bottle and the spider was still moving around. So now I’m freaked out, the spider is till there and now there’s a puddle of poison on the floor. I was tempted to just use a fly swatter on it, but then I would have had to get close enough to use the fly swatter and that just wasn’t happening. So I run to his parent’s house and down to the basement and get my fiance. We try to go back up the stairs, but guess what” THere’s a spider on the stairs, and on the ceiling. We get outside, there are dozens of daddy-long legs running around and a horde of ants swarming a dead bird right next to the front door of the cabin.

    It was all sorted out in the end, but that story has gone down in my in-law’s family history. And, funnily enough, they live in such a small town that when we went to Sam’s club (which is an hour away) the next day my mother-in-law’s best friend’s sister asked, ” So, how was the spider incident?” oy vay.

  69. Ford says:

    spiders are delicious! on toast! grilled! yum!

  70. Darkpheonix XIII says:

    My sister is afraid of spiders. If there is a little spider anywhere she’s at, she yells for me to take care of it. I then go, catch the spider in my hand, start to take it outside, and she yells at me to kill it. I put it outside.

  71. Darkpheonix XIII says:

    Oh, and Biff is reminding me of Ernest from “Ernest goes to jail” when the floor polishing machine went haywire. that’s the best movie ever.

  72. pyrocat100 says:

    Spiders rule! I love spiders. Muahahaha, they shall take over the world :D!

  73. Elkian says:

    I used to be terrified of spiders and very comfortable in the dark. Now the dark makes me nervous and tarantulas are no big deal.
    Little spiders, tho, the kind that JUMP and disappear….

  74. Ashley says:

    last night i was on my deck and there was this huge spider(body the size of a quater not including legs)on my sliding door leading outside and i freaked. I started screaming and crying so i went in the house and my dog was looking at me like i was crazy(german sheperd she is now dead).then my dad came out and set the spider on fire and while it was on fire it fell off of the door(thank god).i am just terrified of spiders. they can me the size of a mustard seed and i will freak out and start crying.

  75. Ashley says:

    they can BE the size of a mustard seed and i will freakout

  76. sir jorge says:

    wow, that’s just too insane.

  77. Psymon says:

    I won’t kill most spiders because of the off chance they might help control the fly population. Black Widows are the exception—I kill them. Since my brother is somewhat afraid of spiders (I don’t think he has panic attacks when he sees them), I carry them outside fairly often. Just one little thing—I try my very best not to touch a spider with my skin, because I’m afraid to be bitten—even if there’s no way that tiny creature could possibly even pinprick me. I remember playing with little jumping spiders about 6mm long, though, so I haven’t always been so cautious.

  78. Pom Rania says:

    I’m TERRIFIED of spiders.

  79. Grand Duke Thomson the Nothingth says:

    I bit a spider once. Now it has all the powers of a man! It fights spider-crime.

  80. Cari says:

    We watch a lot of science fiction. There seem to be a lot of giant spiders crawling around in sci-fi and fantasy movies. I’m afraid of spiders, and have to close my eyes. My husband has to tell me when there gone. Which is fair, because I have to tell him when the CSI autopsy scenes are over.

    Formula 409 kills spiders and insects and cleans up afterward.

  81. Raxon says:

    I had a pet black widow a few years ago, her name was hillary, and she was actually very well behaved. It’s really amazing to drop a couple crickets in there for her and see that she can tell the difference between the crickets and my finger, and by that, I mean when I stuck my finger in there, she would retreat to her corner. The best part is she never once bit me. No, I do not fear spiders unless they jump out of nowhere, it’s not the bite that scares me, it’s the shock that there’s something leaping out. Yeah, my parents took me to see Arachnophobia as a kid because it was advertised as a comedy.

    And for reference, yes, I do have common sense, I simply choose to ignore it.

  82. Deteramot says:

    My sister once sprayed a spider with so much Lysol, it disintegrated. Which was kinda gross.

  83. Soltueur says:

    Deter, lol.

    As for the comic: What if it crawls up the cord? πŸ˜›

  84. the walrus says:

    The spiders in my basement are the size of small cars. Fortunately their population is kept low by the rogue death-turret population. The spiders can hide in shadows the size of a quarter, and a single bite turns a person into an astronaut.

  85. Michael-Forest says:

    I kill black widows, but I’m always glad when I see wolf spiders in my home; they’re very efficient hunters, and often take out other spiders, but they’re extremely non-aggressive and have excellent vision, so they almost never bite people. They are, however, very fond of hanging out in the open, and so are quite easy to kill (much easier than many of the more dangerous spiders they hunt).

  86. Raven Gold says:

    I allways try and let a spider or 2 run free in my room. They keep out the two most vile of creatures on the planet. Prissy people and mosquitos

  87. Zero says:

    I used to be the official spider killer at our house. I enjoyed it quite a bit too. The fun wore off after my sister had me get a decent sized one in her room. I was bored so I scooped it up in a little paper cup dumped hairspray, air freshener, glue, and who know what else on it. I found that cup again a week or so later and for some reason turned it upside-down over the toilet. I was amazed when I found that the spider actually poured out. I was thinking something along the lined of “Holy crap! I just liquified a spider. How can I possibly top this?” It’s just never been as fun since then.

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