#479 – Great
Posted on April 4, 2008 at 12:00 am by Chris
Chapter: Comics
I love cheese but cheese graters are scary. When I was in college and didn’t have a dish washer I would dread having to wash them by hand. So many cutting surfaces to accidentally cut yourself on. When I worked at restaurants they always had a big electric cheese shredder. Those things could really do some damage if you weren’t careful.
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I like the cheese graters at Italian restaurants, the kind with the crank that the waiter brings right to your table. I always get a huge pile of cheese on whatever I’m having.
i hert my thum doing that once.
i _hate_ it when that happens
I love cheese, it is amazing…
also, for future reference, *hurt* and *thumb* (sorry, I can’t stand misspellings on simple words)
you tipe on cold medacin and see how ell you do kyle
It looks more like poor spelling than poor ‘type’-ing induced by cold ‘medicine’. How can you typo ‘medacin’ from ‘medicine’?? ‘ell’ is an understandable typo, though.
Also, PUN TITLE ARGH!
Looks liek Caitlin might be a litle nitpicky. This maeks me laff. xD
Incidentally, I heart Biff and his fantabulous acts of random Biffery!
Biff doesn’t seem to be taking very good care of his hands lately…
I did that once, except not to that extent. I lost a fingernail because I wasn’t paying attention to what I was grating… I also peeled a carrot once, and by the time I was done there was almost none left.
@Caitlin I actually like puns… I think they’re funny, but I’m not sure why. because they’re so bad they’re good?
Wonder how biff is going to get his hand back.
And…what could biff be watching on TV. ^_^
This only strengthens my theory that Biff is made out of some form of clay 😛
Simple SEA, he goes back in time to stop himself from grating his hand up. >> we all know he has a time machine
This pun is superior in many ways.
There has got to be a lot of stuff under that grater….
Biff must not have any bones… I’d imagine they’d be hard to grate with a normal one.
I love grating stuff… assuming the size of the to be grated isn’t larger than the grater. Then it becomes a hassle.
weird…is Biff made of dough or something?
Biff is made out of ink, we know this because he doesnt activate the motion sensors on elevator doors. Looks like hes gone through alot of BIFF(tm) brand ink to fix himself up this week.
I have kind of the same fear, but it extends to reaching into a cup that has uncovered Exacto Blades in it.
@Joshua Reese – http://thebookofbiff.com/2007/08/07/306-jar/
The implications of this strip are sort of horrifying. Somewhere, some place, there is RESIDUE.
Nah, it’s as I’ve suspected for a while. Biff is made of CHEESE.
Sera gives Biff a hand.
Man, I’ll tell you though, I still am not a fan of cheese graters. I always end up grating a little bit of my self along with the cheese 🙁 Even at 19 years old, I’m afraid of a simple peice of cutlery.
“Sera gives Biff a hand.”
Ba-dum-pish. ;
Whoa, I lost the second half of my comment. I wonder if that was random, or if it’s a problem with Firefox…
I gotta HAND it to you, Sera, that was clever.
yeah biff has is brows back
OUCH! Although with a lack of bone, blood and fleshy bits on that stump, Biff has been revealed to be made of radish….
@speeearr – Hahaha!
does this mean biff will get a hook, or better yet a sword
OR…………………………………………………………………
*drum roll*
A CHEESE GRATER!
or maybe a permanant puppet or maybe flaming hammers!
Goodness gracious great flaming hammers!
TROGDOR!!!!!
My wife has cut herself so many times on those things… She really just needs to use the food processer we have.
Biff needs a helping hand there with graters.
Biff apparently bleeds as much as a Jedi.
it’s easy to clean a cheese grater as long as you go in the direction you wouldn’t go to grate cheese.
I like to threaten to kill someone with a cheese grater. it always gets such confused looks…
the horror of the idea is unimaginable
Imagine if he had been grating head cheese.
Owwww… I’ve done something like that once. o.- Took off a good chunk of a thumb. Anyway, this is gonna sound random, but I’d love to thank Chris for drawing Biff- I only found him today… (And with the help of Mt. Dew I have seen every comic. Go sugar-rush.)
I always use the bottle brush to wash up the cheese grater- that way my hands are nowhere near it and it doesn’t rip up the clothes or sponges I use to wash up.
I don’t actually use the cheese grater though, as I don’t like cheese- and have no idea what the other four sides of the cheese grater are meant to be used for (Is one for zesting lemons or somthing?)
This is why I buy bags pre-grated cheese. My wife bought me a cheese grater that I’ve never used. I’m saving that bad boy for a zombie attack.
@ Charlotte:
side1= normal grated cheeese
side2= cheeese slicer (sometimes with a smaller lemon zester)
side3= fine grater
side4= Zester.
Where is his hand?! is it piled up inside the cheeese grater?? or has biff made some sort of teleportational device inside the grater which transfers it directly to another plate somewhere? if he has, i want one. no matter how well i grate cheese, or how sharp the grater is, i always end up covering the table in grated cheese.
@ people who can grate cheese without spillage: i’m jealous!
@Dare – Hey, you’re welcome. 🙂
@Taz: Since the comments accept html code, you will lose whatever you type after a “<” character until you type a “>” character. This is the most common reason for losing half of a comment. I get around this by knowing the html codes for the relevant characters. (^_^)
FYI, the code is: ampersand, ell (L), tee (T), semicolon. & L T ;
Cool—I finally went through the whole archive—not to mention the comments.
Cheese graters make me a little nervous, too; there is no reason they should, though, since I generally pay enough attention to prevent grating anything with nerves in it, and it would take quite a bit more spaciness to actually cut myself with the cheese grater.
I see the comic, and the first thing I think of isn’t a grater, but a shredder… And industrial shredder… An industrial, high-security shredder. Named Clyde.
Clyde would eat entire technical manuals, PVC covers, steel piano-hinges, and all, in one go – even manuals that were many hundreds of pages thick. And he’d spit out tiny confetti out the other end – flakes so small they would float in the air. NO ONE was going to reconstruct those documents!
Now… Imagine what would happen if Clyde got a hold of your hand… I suspect it’d look a lot like the image in this cartoon.
*looks at finger* My injury hasnt healed all the way yet. I love cheese so even with my fear of cheese graters it is over ruled by the wanting of cheese. ^_^ yay cheese.
I guess Biff doesn’t need anything terribly sophisticated or complex to injure himself. But now I can’t help but wonder where are the “shreadings” of his hand?
@ Chivalrybean: lol!
“I have a cheese-shredder at home, which is its positive name. They don’t call it by its negative name, which is sponge-ruiner. Because I wanted to clean it, but now I have little bits of sponge that would melt easily over tortilla chips.” -Mitch Hedberg
A friend of mine lived in an apartment building with stairs that looked like cheese graters. I was scared to death of those things. I wouldn’t stand on them for too long because I was afraid I would trip and literally grate my knees off or something.
being a dish washer for the local grill and bar taught me many nifty things like how to clean graters with out mortal injury 🙂 its actually quite simple just scrub the INSIDE of the thing the inside isnt sharp at all. just stick your favorite sponge/ wash cloth thru the big opening at the bottom and have at it your knuckles and fingernails willl thank you. the only thing you have to do is make sure the water is ALMOST too hot to touch. it will soften any hard and or resistant bits’o cheese.
Did you hear about the blind man who found the cheese grater? He had a heart attack. In the hospital, he said that it was the scariest book he ever ‘read’.
Electric cheese? I’ve never had that before…
Dude…I didn’t have a cheese grater in college. Too fancy.