The Corrupt Wish Game

[Ziggy Stardust]

You have something, but then some broad takes it and the Beatles sing about her instead of you.

I wish I was a classy broad.

[Pieman]

You're a very fat medic.

I wish for A game of TF2.

[Mystery Fish]

You have to play against me. There is no challenge.

I wish I was better at FPS games.

[Pieman]

You're now at that point of skill where you are so good you annihilate everyone, but you can't go easy on them so everyone hates you and kicks you out of existance.

I wish for something to cheer me up.

EDIT: Er, Ziggy, how is that a corruption?

[Ziggy Stardust]

Ees no wish! A puppy named Clarence had fallen into a river.

I wish I wasn't so behind on schoolwork.

[juneloveslotr]

You get expelled and now have no schoolwork, or future for that matter.

I wish that Pel didn't have to get up so early to get to work in the morning.

[Silfedac]

Now he doesn't have to get up until nine in the afternoon. However, it's because he now works ten to eleven.

I wish that I was better at writing essays.

[Ziggy Stardust]

(NINE IN THE AFTERNOOOON! YOUR EYES ARE THE SIZE OF THE MOOOON! YOU COULD CAUSE YOU CAN, SO YOU DOOOOO! WE'RE FEELING SO GOOD, JUST THE WAY THAT WE SHOULD, WHEN IT'S NINE IN THE AFTERNOOOOON...)
You're now so good that you find writing in the format your teacher requests is restricting your artistic prowess and you refuse to turn in a paper.

I wish for a less crowded schedule.

[Ss4gogeta0]

all of your classes get annihilated and your stuck with the one class you hate everyday....
(Ohh by the way O'HAYO GOZAIMASU!!! ZIGGY-CHAN... O-GENKI DESU KA?....)

i wish i was more proficient in japanese so i wouldnt have to keep reading these damn books......

[Pieman]

You forget how to speak English, just as Japanese becomes a dead language.

I wish it wasn't so easy to get lost in minecraft.

[Ziggy Stardust]

There's no challenge to it any more and you realize just how much of your time you've been spending on it. Then you go purchase a motorbike and ride it into oblivion.

I wish for a Tim Curry to call my very one. I will hug him and squeeze him and name him George.

[Lich king]

The genie thing had a lot of wax in his ears and misheard your wish and gave you a Very One that you can call tim curry instead.

I wish for a corruption that is uninspiring and not complex at all.

[Mystery Fish]

... And you DIE.

I wish I had some fireworks (I know this cannot possibly end well, but bring it on.)

[Lich king]

...The fireworks blowup and you DIE.

I wish for a pet Gecker.

[Pieman]

The Gecker blowup and you DIE.

I wish to blowup and DIE.

[Ziggy Stardust]

Your 'spontaneous combustion' method of suicide doesn't work out as exactly as planned. After being released from the hospital for treatment of third-degree burns on various portions of your anatomy, you decide to try a simpler method and hang yourself. Unfortunately, once more you are unsuccessful and wind up paralyzed. Several years later after your close friends have deserted you and you are unable to complete a high school education but your parents can no longer deal with your upkeep, you are sitting in your electric chair with an oxygen tank, motionless as always. Someone flicks a cigarette butt at you in a gesture of dismissal, but it interrupts your oxygen stream... it blows up and YOU DIE.

I wish for a stuffed animal in the shape of a porpoise.

[Lich king]

Stuffed animal in the shape of a porpoise and you DIE.


I wish for the "and you DIE" to become a running gag for the Corrupt wish game thread. A long running one.

[Mystery Fish]

It is. What a waste of a wish.

I wish an achievement I hadn't earned hadn't unlocked earlier when I was playing Dragon Age. An achievement I didn't achieve but I have, QQ.

[Torg]

Now it can never be unlocked ever.

I wish the bulk of Fable 3's plot was more than just a glorified fundraiser.

[Pieman]

It's no longer glorified.

I wish I was better at TF2.

[Mystery Fish]

You're now at that point of skill where you are so good you annihilate everyone, but you can't go easy on them so everyone hates you and kicks you out of existance.

I wish I had a tree, the leaves of which remain golden-brown all the time.

[Pieman]

The genie thing whatever still hasn't cleared out his ears. You get a barren tree, save for the twenty or so Gordon Browns sitting in it.

I wish for a Zorb.

[Mystery Fish]

(That's okay too, it just means I get to burn it instead of admiring it. Everybody wins! Except Gordon Brown.)

You get trapped inside it, doomed to live your life rolling endlessly, unable to interact with the outside world in any way other than rolling into/over things.
Actually that sounds pretty cool. You're like a katamari!
Oh, but then you realise that, being trapped inside, you can't get food... And you DIE.

I wish FURU GUY!

(Aside: this is awesome, if only for the intro and HOW WELL IT FITS IN. It's like Fresh Prince of Doukutsu, you just wouldn't expect it.)

[Ziggy Stardust]

My head explodes from the sheer volume of... SOMETHING when I click that link. You go into Ziggles withdrawal. Nice going there.
(Seriously what is this I don't even)

I wish that I didn't feel like eating after I'm not hungry anymore.

[juneloveslotr]

You become anorexic. It kills you matabolism and ends up making you fat and diabetic.

I wish I liked physical exercise as much as Pel does.
 

[Ziggy Stardust]

You become incredibly well-muscled and accidentally crush Pel's head.

I wish Pel's name didn't keep reminded me of Pelle, Manson's Swedish broseph.

[Lich king]

Your mind is exploded therefore removing your ability to be reminded of Pelle and you DIE.

I wish I had a working copy of the Rocky Horror Picture Show on DVD.

[SpriteMeister]

The copy is always working, and when it comes home from work, it's always too tired to play for you.

I wish I had more time and internets to do all the things I want without cutting into my work hours, girlfriend, sleep, or Rock Band time.

[Ziggy Stardust]

You've now so much time that you put off your relationships with other people indefinitely, stating lamely 'You'll do it later'.

I wish I could play Rock Band with you fellows.

[juneloveslotr]

You start playing and realize (incorrectly) that you are monumentally better then us and wish for a greater challenge. You pool all your resources and do a few favors that you'd rather not get into in order to put on a solo concert of you playing all of the real instruments at the same time. Being such a novel concept, the house is packed the night of the concert. Being as good as you are, you neither practice nor decide on the night's set-list before hand. You get up on stage and completely humiliate yourself and generations of your family to come. Realizing the the mistake you made, you go back to your hotel in tears. A day later you are found upside-down naked except for a party hat on your left foot dead having ODed on a combination of Meth, Viagra, booze and peeps. Death was declared to be caused from asphyxiation due to a large dildo being shoved down your throat by a whore that then took every late item of value from your room and corpse.

I wish that my corruption wasn't so graphic and disturbing.