Action thread (What's Up, Pussycat?)

[Drakey]

Ollie sat in the darkness, inspecting his claws. Such a shame that some cats were robbed by their masters of these grand implements. Or of other things. Ollie was an unfortunate victim of neutering. He was a barn cat, always had been, but still, his owners had thought it better to not have him reproducing. Leave that to Mister Little, the huge tomcat that lorded over the farm with all the lazy power of a crimelord.
Ollie's claws retracted silently back into his paws and he stood up, padding away to find his friends. The cats of Garfield Valley had been moving in on the territory that was his home. All his life, Ollie had lived on Felix Hill. Garfield Valley was where the enemy lived. Their ruthless commander was a deadly opponenet, one of the few that would kill in a fight...

Lucky Star, Lucky to her friends, prize gem of Flufferkin's harem, sat staring at her claws. She was reflecting on how some cats were declawed, but not her. It seemed unfair. She wasn't likely to lose these things, but she wasn't much of a user of them, either.
She was a barn cat, a mouser by profession. She'd never had a kitten, and she never would, because she was spayed. She was a loyal member of the Garfield Valley nation. Her master was Flufferkin, the head honcho and stud of the Valley. He commanded an agressive legion of about twenty cats, but he wanted more. He'd been going after Felix Hill. Unlike Mister Little, Flufferkin was a real tomcat, a pile of power and grace. That was why Garfield Valley would overtake the Hill eventually...

Okay, here's the deal: you're a cat.
You use no tools, you have only one kind of ally, and that's other cats.
You live in one of three places: Garfield Valley Farms, Felix Hill Orchards, or the surrounding area.
You have one of three alliegances: Flufferkin, leader of the Garfield Valley gang of cats, Mister Little, head tomcat of the Felix Hill cats, or one of the neutral cat-nations that surround the two farms.

Geography: The two farms, totalling about forty acres, are surrounded by thick woods. These woods are full of tiny, warring factions, but none of the factions touches the two gangs in the farms.
Felix Hill, ruled by the powerful Mister Little, is an apple orchard, about thirty acres of land. It is surrounded by a long fence. On the end of the property nearest to Garfield Valley, there is a gradual slope downwards, and the barn, main headquarters of the Felix Hill nation, sits on the edge of this precipice. Farther back from the border, the orchard is split in half diagonally by a stream that runs eventually to Garfield Valley. It's full of fish, and there is a clearing next to it where kittens are raised and there are plenty of mice. Who controls this field, located close to the northern woods, thirty feet back from the start of the downslope to Garfield Valley, controls Felix Hill. On the opposite end of the property from the barn is the farmhouse and driveway. Most cats that go here never return. Beyond that is Highway Y, an impassable place that kills all cats that try to cross it.
Garfield Valley, a ten-acre private farm, is home to the Garfield Valley cat-nation. Their headquarters, the little stable just at the bottom of the slope, is full of horses that scare the living butt out of the Felix Hill cats, who have no experience with horses. Beyond the barn, there are riding trails and the like, as well as the bottom part of the stream that runs from Felix Hill. There is a hay-storage barn in the middle of the property. Kittens are almost always raised here, and it is the single most strategically important spot in the whole area. Beyond the hay barn is the house and driveway, from shich no cat returns the same, and beyond them, the impassable Highway X.


Rules:

No one may take either strategically important area (field or hay barn) without a fight of epic proportions. Cats will die if either is taken, and there will be terrible unrest.

No technology. If there's a piece of wood floating in the stream that you can jump onto, you can do that, but you can't build a boat.

No ubering. Thank you!

No being the leader of a cat-nation with more than three cats in it.

No more than two characters.

No controlling the major plot-related decisions of Flufferkin or Mister Little.

You are not a hardened killer of anything but mice. Killing will be hard to do and rare.

Follow the profile-posting format.

Character shields apply.

Wait for me to start.


Profile Format:

Name: (This is the name your owners gave you. Be funny or profound or use your own cat's name, I don't care.)
Faction and Location: (Duh)
Gender and Age: (Duh)
Intact?: (Spayed/neutered? If so, your character will be more stable and less prone to distraction, but will also be essentially gender-neutral, a basic soldier-cat. An intact cat is more agressive, but can be easily distracted by cats of the opposite sex or by perceived rivals.) (Claws? If declawed, then you have an automatic intelligence and charm boost, simply because you've had to adapt, but you're also weaker in a fight. If clawed, you're not a perfect genius or a charmer, but you can fight much better.)
Bio (optional): (Some info about your cat.)
Appearance/Breed (optional): (post either a description or a single pure breed.)

My characters:

Name: Ollie
Faction and Location: Felix Hill, the barn.
Gender and Age: 6-year-old male
Intact?: Neutered, with claws.
Bio (optional): None
Appearance/Breed (optional): A large, tough, grey cat of mixed breed. He has a single black stripe over his left eye, and the tip of is tail is Orangey.

Name: Lucky Star
Faction and Location: Garfield Valley, the hay barn
Gender and Age: 5-year-old female
Intact?: Spayed, with claws.
Bio (optional): None
Appearance/Breed (optional): A small, purebred Siamese, Lucky is very limber and graceful, and very fast. She can be somewhat fragile and weak, though.

Any questions?

[Orangey]

When you said "Wait for me to start", do you mean we can't post our bios until you say, or just can't take actions yet?

[Silfedac]

Just to get it out of the way: "WHOA-OO-OH-OO-OH!"

Also, Orangey, I'm assuming the latter.

[Drakey]

I assumed, oh ye of Orangey and Slumber,  that you would realize that the thread really can't go anywhere until there are bios for more than my characters.
Me posting repeatedly about the actions of two cats with nobody to keep me company would be pretty strange would it not?

[Torg]

This website's all about strange.

[Silfedac]

It might actually help you fit in.

[Orangey]

Mr. Grey languished in a sunny patch near the creek; it was a tributary off the main body of water that ran through the farms. Mr. Grey was an unaligned cat; in fact, he'd been born in the suburbs of a city fairly distant from the farms.

Mr. Grey was a black cat with white patches on his chest, feet, and left ear. His name was the ironic choice of a six-year-old who thought he was being SO clever. He'd been de-clawed shortly after birth, but he hadn't been neutered early on. However, after an unfortunate tryst with the neighbor's pedigreed Siamese, certain parts had been confiscated. The neighbors had insisted that Mr. Grey's family take the single resulting kitten, which had been named Celanine, after a little-known love goddess; without the constant distraction of the 'primal instincts' clouding his judgement, Mr. Grey developed a close relationship with his daughter. Unfortunately, two years after Celanine's birth, the bipeds produced a kitten of their own. A kitten which was allergic to something called 'betdandre', or something like that; for some reason, this meant that Mr. Grey and Celly were no longer welcome in the home. Their owners put them in the mobile cage and took them for a car ride; never comfortable in cars, the cats were understandably nervous. However, the car didn't take the familiar route to The Man with the Needles. The drive stretched on and on, until the houses and fences were replaced by trees and brush. Eventually, the car stopped, and the male biped got out. He pulled the cage out of the back seat, opened the door, and dumped the cats unceremoniously on the ground by the road. Before the cats could disentangle themselves, the male had gotten back in the car and driven away.

Weeks later, Mr. Grey and Celly had settled in fairly well; they were both de-clawed, but got by with stealth and teeth. Celly rarely ventured outside the clearing they called their own, but Mr. Grey was a bit more adventurous; he frequently  visited the farms and watched the comings and goings of the cats there. He wasn't sure what was going on, but he was pretty sure that there was some conflict between the two groups, and he was pretty sure he wanted to be there when things came to a head; it promised to be fascinating, and Mr. Grey was pretty smart, even for a neuter. He wondered what a cat with ambition and cleverness could do to rally the losers and set up a nice new life for himself.

Name:  Mr. Grey
Faction and Location: Mr. Grey, Clearing Near Border
Gender and Age:  5-year-old male
Intact?: De-clawed, neutered

Name:  Celanine (Celly)
Faction and Location: Mr. Grey, Clearing Near Border
Gender and Age:  2-year-old female
Intact?: De-clawed, spayed
Appearance/Breed : Siamese, but with darker fur and greener eyes

[Drakey]

Well, I'm all for strange, but not the useless brand of it.

[Orangey]

I've posted my profile! Now somebody else do it. I wasted enough time on that that I don't want this thread to fizzle.

I am deadly serious. One of you do something.

[Drakey]

Oops...

How long hath that been up... eth?

Ummm....

Okay, somebody post a bio!

[Torg]

Rainbow, an exiled cat, stretched himself out on a large tree branch, digging his claws into some nearby leaves, and thinking longingly of another leaf. He was a catnip addict, and so had been shunned by Garfield Valley. Unfortunately, he had been forced off the farm before he had been neutered. This frustrated him, as every female he encountered was either spayed or avian; he wasn't into the birds, and the spayed cats weren't interested in him. This left him horny and suffering from withdrawal, and the local mice had felt his anger.

Name: Rainbow
Faction and Location: Unaligned; in the woods surrounding the farms
Gender and Age: 3-year-old male
Intact?: Yes.
Bio: Hates his name with a passion rivaling his love of catnip.
Appearance: Midsized Orangey tabby cat.

You are not a hardened killer of anything but mice.

What about birds?

[Drakey]

(That's good, Torg....

Umm... Small birds, maybe hummingbirds or something. Intact cats should be more dangerous, I guess.)

Lucky padded quietly into the hay barn. Flufferkin looked up. "Your human is taking a horse up the hill," he said irritably.
Lucky sighed. Laura was always doing this. The humans were idiots, constantly in each other's territory, risking attack. She had to try and protect her charge. Laura was barely into maturity, and from the smell of her, fertile. That gave her a special place, and it made her a resource. Lucky padded out and jumped up on the big roan's rump.
Laura looked up and made some noises, and Lucky purred at her.
"You big dumb animal... If only you could understand me. You have to stay here, it's not safe up the hill."
Laura laughed and made some more noises. One was a pale imitation of a cat's meow.
She patted Lucky on the head.

Ollie bounded up to the table. Mister Little had sent him out to take his watch. The human Jack was doing it again. Staring out over the valley from the run-down table while the sun set.
He never watched it set. He watched the enemy barn.
Usually, while he did this, he would be silent, but today, he was tapping his feet. He had a sheet of paper in his hands. He turned and made some noises. One was Ollie's name.
Ollie sighed contentedly as Jack patted him on the head and then turned back to the barn.
Something was coming out of the stable. A horse!
Ollie flinched instinctively. The last attempted takeover had ended with one cat trod upon by the monsters that defended The Valley.
The beast turned and trotted in a straight line towards the hill.
It was carrying an enemy human, one of the females.
Jack seemed happy about this. His blood must be quickening for the coming battle.
The horse wound its way up the hill.

Jack grinned as Laura stepped down from Hugo, the big roan that he liked. There was a little siamese cat curled up on the horse's hindquarters. She unfurled like a snake and jumped down.
"You want to go riding?" Laura said.
Jack could feel the heat rising to his face. "I thought maybe we could just sit," he said.
Laura shook her head. "Screw it!" she exclaimed.

ATTACK! It had to come sooner or late, and now it was here. Ollie broke off his appraisal of the Valley cat and leaped to Jack's defense as the female human tried to bite his face.

"Holy butt, Jack! Your cat is trying to kill me!"
Laura grabbed Ollie and tossed him as far away as she could, just as Lucky Star jumped up on Jack. Laura grabbed the Siamese and tossed her away, then Jack leaned in close and inspected her small collection of cuts from Ollie's claws.

Lucky hissed at the bigger cat and swiped at him as he came charging towards her. She got in one good swipe before she realized that she knew him.
Ollie. He was a sometime contact with the Hill. Big, tough, wily.
He was far toomuch for her to handle.
He was coming around for another attack, and hissing his anger as he came. "Are you prepared to lose, Lucky?"
"This means war!" she cried as he slammed a paw into her and sent her sprawling backwards.

...

Mister Little was fuming. "They let their humans attack ours! We will have justice!" Ollie shook his head, but Little was on a roll. "We'll have justice for this attack, we'll take the hay barn, and we'll--"
"Sir, we can't do it! They'll retaliate before we can do anything there'll be blood over this, I'm sure, but if we attack, it will all be our own. They'll kill the kittens, sir!"

(There's your setup. Have fun with it.)

[Silfedac]

Woohoo! It are my turn for to make a kitty!

Simon was a large mix of a Maine Coon and a stray that no one ever heard from again. After Simon was old enough to look after himself, he ran away from his family and his owners and wandered the world, or at least as much as he could reach on his own four paws. After a year or so of wandering, he came upon the valley with two farms and settled down. One day, while out walking around, he discovered a black-and-white tom a year or so older than himself and a small female cat, a year or so younger, and apparently the tom's kitten. Simon decided that he would be better off sticking in a group then wandering on his own, especially with all the violent activity he had been seeing recently. So he introduced himself, and joined the group under the leadership of the tom.

Name: Simon
Faction and Location: Mr. Grey, Clearing Near Border
Gender and Age: 4-year-old male
Intact?: Neutered, with claws
Bio: Very affectionate and loyal, but a bit of a goof-off.
Appearance: A large (about 2 ¹/₂ feet from nose to tail) grey cat, very fluffy. A Maine Coon mix.

Done, yes? Just waiting for orders.

[Orangey]

(Ooh, having Simon around makes things much easier.)

Mr. Grey had been watching the events of a, frankly, very slow day from the shade of a large bush near the central fence when he saw one of the hoof-beasts trot past carrying a female biped and a female cat. Mr. Grey knew these two; the cat was a Siamese that reminded him strongly of Celly. She seemed to be just another member of the Small Faction, but was close to the big tom that ran it. It was the biped that interested him more; Mr. Grey knew the habits of the bipeds a lot better than these silly country cats, and he knew that she was involved in the excessively long and complicated mating rituals of the bipeds with one of the male bipeds from Large Faction. These silly hicks seemed to think they were fighting, but Mr. Grey knew better; Mr. Grey also knew he could exploit this knowledge. He slunk after the hoof-beast, keeping to the shadows, until it reached its destination.

Mr. Grey had been right. He permitted himself a small congratulatory purr as he watched the inevitable conflict occur. He knew that the bipeds wouldn't be satisfied with their little tryst interrupted so, and he believed that their rituals had come to the point that the female would sneak out later that night (which was odd; in his experience, it was generally the male that made such a rendezvous) to meet with her mate. As the fur flew, he chuckled to himself.

As things settled down, and the participants went their separate ways, Mr. Grey tailed the male cat back to Large Faction's headquarters. It was disgustingly easy to slip past the watchers; Mr. Grey would have something to say about that when HE was in charge. He watched the male approach the tom even Mr. Grey knew as Mister Little; they had words. Sharp words. Loud words. Mr. Grey's tail twitched in delight; Mister Little was as big an oaf as could be hoped. Eventually, the smaller male broke off, an Mr. Grey followed him. As soon as the male was alone, Mr. Grey spoke from the shadows:

"Toms can be so blustery, can't they? Thinking with their orbs all the time... You know an attack now would be foolish, don't you? You can't let something like this happen, can you?"

[Drakey]

(Ooh. Likage of post length is occurring.

@Silfedac: approved.)

Ollie stared at the cat in front of him.
"What do you want, who are you, and give me a reason not to rough you up. In that order, Or I take your ears off."
The cat backed away a couple of steps. "Well, I just wanted to speak to you, to tell you that I agree an attack would be foolish--"
"Mister Little knows that already. He may think with his genitals sometimes, but for all that, he thinks with them better than a lot of cats think with their heads. I keep him from reacting to the raw anger. It's my job. Who are you."
"My name is Mr. Grey. I'm--"
"The leader of a little tribelet in the border woods, I know."
Grey stared at Ollie. "If you knew who I was, why did you ask?"
"To see if you would lie. If you lied, I would have taken your ears off. Why shouldn't I do it anyways?"
If cats could sweat, Grey would have been pouring it now. This was starting to attract attention. The Hill boasted more than enough cats to eliminate him and all his allies by sheer numbers. It was why forest cats never tried to come into the farms. Not enough allies.
This could easily go south, fast.

Lucky Star padded quietly up the hillside. Oh, she had tried, but Flufferkin was just too determined.
An attack? On one of his humans? Unthinkable, and demanding of revenge.
Lucky flicked her head at the cats around her. The two males slunk forwards. One of them jumped on the mother of their target, and one of them grabbed the kitten.
"Let's go," Lucky said. "We take her to the hay barn. And leave her mother unharmed."
They ran for it, though they didn't need to. No Hill cat would dare follow them this far at night.
Too much possibility of ambush.
And that could prove lethal.
They returned to the hay barn and tucked the terrified kitten into a secluded spot. Lucky stood over her.
"We'll get you fed. You're useless if you starve to death."

The tense moment was interrupted by a panicked yowling from the Field.
Ollie recognized the sound of one of Mister Little's rather expansive harem. He ran, and Grey followed him, seemingly out of curiosity.
Lucille was pacing back and forth, her eyes darting around.
"Lucille, what happened?"
The cat shuddered. "They took my kitten!"

[Orangey]

(If I'd known we could play each others characters, I'd have had this conversation myself...)

As he padded behind the other cat, Mr. Grey wished he had had a better target to shadow; intact cats were much harder to reason with, and thus much harder to influence properly. But, he'd started, and there was no going back now. Ollie could easily have attacked and no-one would have batted an eye; the fact that he hadn't was promising. Mr. Grey suspected that Ollie knew Little was too reactionary, and that in these increasingly tense times that meant mistakes would be made.

This all evaporated out of Mr. Grey's head in an instant as the scene unfolded. The Small Faction (he must remember to find out their name) cats had pulled a stunt he thought was inconceivable at this juncture. The very audacity of it was sure to set in motion events Mr. Grey had a butterfly's chance of steering... He had hoped to have much more time whittle at the confidence of the Large Faction cats before anything serious happened. This may warrant a change of strategy.

Well, every time one door closes, another opens.
"Little's not going to want to take that sitting down... This doesn't seem normal though; why did they take the kitten but leave its mother unharmed?"

[Torg]

Rainbow had noticed the brief conflict that had erupted between the two humans. Knowing his former allies as he did, he was sure this would go downhill fast.
He moved to the edge of the forest, closer to where he expected a fight to take place. Maybe this night would be more exciting than the rest.

[Drakey]

(Playing other's characters is a judgement call. It gets easier as the thread moves on, because you know them better, but if you're not sure how the character would react, or the character is making a decision, leave it up to the other poster.)

Ollie rolled his eyes. "Flufferkin ordered that. He wanted us to know. He's trying to provoke us. You still haven't told me why I shouldn't take your ears off. For all I know, you have designs on taking Mister Little's place in charge."
Grey looked rather startled for a moment, and Ollie moved in dangerously close, the fur on his back bristling up. "I should warn you that taking over from Mister Little is a very dangerous proposition, especially for one of your..." his eyes flicked to Grey's feet... "Your status."
Grey looked about ready to take his head off at the reminder of the trauma he'd suffered in his youth.
He hissed, a low, dangerous sound, and Ollie turned away. "If you try it, Mister Little will kill you. He's done it before."

[Orangey]

(Out of character knowledge much?)
Mr. Grey forced himself to regain his composure.
"I hardly think I would have designs on controlling a whole nation; it's far too much work, and i don't have the resources to make a serious bid for power. I just don't like to see people make bad decisions."

[Drakey]

(Logical knowledge. Ollie's specialty is to analyze things like this. He knows his shtuff.)

Ollie thought for a moment.
"I better be the one to break this to Mister Little. He'll be very unhappy. I suggest that when the war comes, and it's coming now, you choose a side. You're too close to the farms. If you don't choose, you lose."

The kitten had no name. It was just a kitten, undiscovered by the humans. Perfect. Lucky set her up with a mother that had recently lost one of her litter.
"Keep her safe," Lucky said. "If we lose her, we lose ourselves."

"Did WHAT? I'll have his head! I'll have his head and I'll have his throat between my teeth and I'll--"
"MISTER LITTLE! Calm down." The big tomcat stopped pacing.
"He stole one of mine. I want. Her. Back. I'll go to war to get her."
Ollie hung his head towards the ground. "A small team has a better chance of making it through, and at midday, it'll be best. They'll be sleepy by then, and we can see them just as well as they can see us. I can lead the team."
Mister Little sat back and closed his eyes tight. "Yes, Ollie. Just... Do it right. She comes back alive."

[Silfedac]

Mr Grey padded back into the clearing where Simon and Celly had been waiting for his return. "So how did it go, boss?" Simon asked.

[Orangey]

"...Less than spectacularly. Simon, I need you to come with me; I have a proposal for a certain cat."

Mr. Grey had listened to Ollie and and Mister Little's conversation, and decided on yet another course of action; it was getting harder to plan ahead, and too many variables were popping up. He and Simon sought out Ollie, and approached him.

"I thought about what you said, and you're right; I need friends if I and my tribe are going to make it through the coming conflict, and I think we could prove to be assets to your nation. I feel we would be the perfect candidates for a mission to rescue the kitten, as the other cats won't recognize us as a part of your group."

[Drakey]

"Well, you're thinking. But there's a problem with that."
"What?"
Ollie twitched a whisker irritably. "Flufferkin is paranoid. I've seen outside cats get questioned intensively and injuriously, and they're sure to have a guard around the kitten, have her deep inside the hay barn, and be ready to kill. If you can get in, we can come and rescue you, probably. But you have to get in, first. You could get hurt, and badly. You want to do this?"

[Orangey]

"Well, I'm a lot faster than I look, and you can see Simon here. I think it's worth a shot."

[Drakey]

Ollie sighed. "All right. Here's what you do. You go in and start trying to convince them to let you in tonight. By noon tomorrow, you should be in. You get in to see the kittens in the hay barn. Look for one that's a little more guarded. Flufferkin may be paranoid, but he's not stupid, so she'll have a surrogate. It'll be the kitten that looks different from all her siblings. You get in, you talk to the kitten. Make it fast, because they'll susepct something. Retrieve the kitten and make a break for it, but call for help the second you make your move. Our team should be there by then, and hopefully their cover will stay. This last part is imperitave: If you hear a struggle outside before you make your move, abort the mission. It'll mean we've had our cover blown, and you need to maintain your cover. You're declawed, so you should be able to bat away at a couple of members of our team without hurting anybody. Do it to maintain your cover. Get back to us as soon as possible."
Grey was taking in the information as quickly as he could. "Who should I approach over there?"
"Cat named Lucky Star is your best bet. Fierce fighter, but she's reasonable. Be cautious."

(The mission is going to fail for plot-related reasons.)

[Orangey]

(Hmm... Dang.)

"How do I call for help? Is there a signal or something? I don't want to blow my cover."

[Silfedac]

(I hate it when I have to follow a plot. Cramps mah style.  )

"Yeah, and what about me? Grey may be declawed, but I'm not."

[Drakey]

(This is very nonrailroad. The failure of the mission is to ensure that war breaks out, and from there, it's all cats fighting with each other and trying to take over territory.)

Ollie laughed. "You don't have to worry about blowing your cover. Once you start retrieving that kitten, it's blown. You have to move her towards the exit, and that's gonna trigger them. Just grab her and yell for us. Simon, you'll cover Grey's butt. You're the tough guy. Guard the kitten and guard Grey."

[Silfedac]

(Good.)

"Sounds good." Simon turned to Grey. "Well, boss? Shall we get started?"

[Orangey]

"I have a bad feeling about this. Who will be covering us? Just a small squad, or what?"