#762 – Oolong

I see lots of contests on blogs. “Just make a comment in this post to enter.” I immediately think “Yay free stuff!” and the leave my comment. Then it dawns on me… I don’t own any of the new game systems… what am I going to do with this Butter Churn Revolution game controller?


43 thoughts on “#762 – Oolong”

  1. MadDavid says:

    That’s more of a day’s supply of tea for me.

    And “Butter Churn Revolution” sounds a lot better than many of the games with their own controllers.

  2. Drakey says:

    Nicely done.

  3. corjoth says:

    i agree with MadDavid… when i drink tea it is usually from a bowel that holds a pot and a half of tea…. and i usually drink several that day

  4. Mophtran says:

    Wacky proportions week?

  5. Sciuridae says:

    How do you keep that much tea warm?

  6. Drakey says:


    Corjoth drinks tea… from a bowel.

    That is WRONG!

  7. reynard61 says:

    To drink it, or to take a hot bath in it; *that* is the question…

  8. Shelly says:

    It isn’t a day’s supply for me, but no more than a week. Would make a cozy bath, though.

  9. Anji says:

    You can bathe in tea!? But wouldn’t you be tempted to add sugar and milk and drink your bath water? I could see how being lavender or chai scented and tasty might seem nice at first but I’d be worried about caffine or aromatherapy addicts that might try to lick me while I’m going about my day.

    I always enter free contests at the mall for cars and such but I never win.

  10. Jippen says:

    Easy resolution, chris. Run your own contest offering a SIGNED butter churn revolution controller! 😀

  11. Mouserz says:

    I never get how much is a years supply of something.

  12. Pieman says:


  13. billy says:

    I’m pretty sure “year’s supply” actually means, “This stuff will go bad in 6 months and we can’t find anyone who wants to buy it.”

  14. MaskedMan says:

    “Free” anything on the interwebs makes me wonder “what malware will registering for this cause to be downloaded on my system?” or “How deep into my wallet do they wnat to dig *this* time?”

    I daresay that by the time Biff gets more than a little way into that cup o’ tea, there’ll be some serious darwin action happening in it – Molds, fungi, space aliens… all growing in heated competition.

  15. Space Butler says:

    @reynard61 and Anji

    if you really think about it, bathing in something you eat or drink is pretty disgusting

  16. greatslack says:

    Disproportionately large things week!

    I’m assuming that he’s holding a single atom in Monday’s comic for this to work.

  17. Polymorph says:

    @Space Butler I drink water, does that mean I’m disgusting for bathing in it?

    Of course, I know what you meant.

  18. Uh, guys? It doesn’t matter what you do with something, there’s nothing you can do if you can’t reach it in the first place…

  19. Dzelda says:

    Well its only impertinent to the fact that Biff cant reach it all. Otherwise a years worth of tea is wonderful.

    That Biff cracks me up he does.

  20. dartigen says:

    My dad would drink that in a week. I might take two weeks.

    If it is dry tea leaves/tea bags, it won’t go off very easily. It’s only once the tea is made that you have issues with freshness.

  21. Chris says:

    Ok, If Biff is 6 feet tall, what is the plausible volume of that tea cup?

  22. i.half4 says:

    Hmmmmmm… Great novels? Gullivers Travels, The long dark tea time of the soul…

  23. Vennificus says:

    about 104 cubic feet of space
    about 2957 litres worth of tea

  24. Clyde says:

    The cup appears to have a diameter of about 4 feet at the base, a diameter of 6 feet around the top, and seems roughly 8 feet tall…
    Using the cone frustum formula: the volume of the cup could be estimated at 159 cubic feet.

    Of course, the inside of the cup is smaller than the outside and could be curved, in which case I’d have to whip out some integrals and stuff.

  25. Chris says:

    So using 2957 liters works out to roughly 34 cups of tea a day for a year.

  26. Mophtran says:

    Biff would be totally unproductive at work; he’d be too busy shaking with caffeine and running to the restroom. If he doesn’t OD on caffeine first, but I doubt Biff is capable of ODing.

  27. Dude says:

    I beg to differ. According to Futurama, after the equivalent caffeine-intake of 100 cups of coffee, Biff will become super-fast and move with blinding speed. Cuz, y’know, Futurama is truth.

  28. Dave says:

    Unfortunately, I am not supposed to drink tea due to its causing my kidneys to make stones. There’s, like, a 2-page list of foods i am supposed to avoid. most if not all of which i enjoy in mass quantities. I made a half gallon of oolong the other day and drank it all by myself.

  29. Dude says:

    Book of Biff Commenter Dave: ???? – 2009

  30. DTanza says:

    @Anji Don`t bother i`ve won several, all they do is beg you to buy a time share.

  31. Linzleh says:

    Aaahhh…tea. A most wonderful beverage. Biff just needz to install a spigot at the base of the mega-mug so he can a cuppa easy or a ladder and a siphon system. Biff’s call…

  32. Radical Edward says:

    If it were iced tea…I would probably put quite a dent in it if I drank.

  33. reynard61 says:

    Space Butler: “@reynard61 and Anji (I)f you really think about it, bathing in something you eat or drink is pretty disgusting”

    I have a female acquaintance who keeps her used tea bags and, at the end of each month, steeps them in her bath. She claims that bathing in tea has therapeutic properties. I’ll admit to a certain amount of skepticism since I’ve never tried it myself. (I only like iced tea.)

  34. -2! says:

    @ Space Butler and reynard61

    I assume that you both eat and drink water at times…

  35. Anji says:

    @ Space Butler – But… I though swimming in a giant pool of chocolate pudding was the apex of indulgent fantasies! I suppose I could substitute pudding with something as equally a guilty pleasure like bon-bons but it just doesn’t seem as nice.

  36. Radical Edward says:

    We all have indulgent fantasies. Of course, I wouldn’t bath in tea unless it had any merits.

  37. i.half4 says:

    On second thought, Monday couldn’t have been Gulliver’s Travels. He was the big one in a Lilliputan world. A sequel maybe? The Return of Gulliver And The Lilliputans Who Followed Him Home? I suppose that could be tightened up a bit… Gulliver and The Chocolate Factory.

  38. i.half4 says:

    Oh, right again. Today is Wednesday. Taking the other Monday into account I’d have to revise my guess to: experiment gone horribly wrong week.

  39. Oh sweet god. I wish I had that cup. I would use it for coffee and you’d never hear from my fat ass again- I’d be dead from caffiene overdose, but I’d be a-smilin’ to put the Joker to shame. 😀

  40. I can safely say that, being a city boy, I am not the only person who would pay to play a game based on farming chores. You can only pretend to be a Czech thug for so long. Plus: no one can make a career from any of the other games on the market. You should EARN your points, and actually get up at 4 AM and S W E A T ! I’m already in line for the first copy of “Butter Churn Revolution”.

  41. When my parents bought their water softener, they got a “years supply”of concentrated soap and other assorted cleaning products (supposedly you didn’t need to use as much with the softened water.) That was probably around 10 years ago. They still haven’t used all of the stuff yet, and the water softener has since stopped working (timer motor went bad)

  42. hayabusa says:

    according to http://www.energyfiend.com/death-by-caffeine, if Biff is at most 170 pounds (although i doubt he’s that much), then it would take roughly 247 cups of brewed tea to kill him. yeah, right (like the almighty Biff could die)

  43. YukiSnowflake says:

    @SpaceButler – You forgot to point out that water is an exception, you can’t drink THAT because fish have sex in it! |:D

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