Whenever I hear a strange noise in the house I immediately take a mental inventory of the objects in the room to decide what I could most likely use to defend myself against the evil person that was surely about to climb the stairs mere moments from now. I never really come up with anything good. A small end table or a lamp are usually my best options as projectiles. Since there are always stairs involved I should probably just keep a bag o marbles next to the bed and be done with it.