#139 – Weed


52 thoughts on “#139 – Weed”

  1. Off and on I’ve jumped around your collection here. Nothing specific to say, except: I like it. (Maybe because Biff and I have so much in common.)

  2. Greender says:

    He needs bigger scissors.

  3. Chris says:

    Andre – what do you have in common with Biff?

    Greender – I think he needs a chainsaw. 🙂

  4. LordRetard says:

    I share his puzzlement and confusion with a world that seems to be inconsistent and irrational. ‘Cept it’s mostly *my* fault that nothing makes sense.

  5. Chris says:

    I sure he would appreciate your sympathy.

  6. Chris: What do Biff and I have in common? We both learn from our experiences, colored by our perceptions, influenced by our, um, oddness. But I gotta give Biff credit, he has a lot more of those weirdly memorable experiences than I.

  7. Keioko says:

    I’ve actually seen a yard get that bad….

    *shudders at the memory of having to clear it out* God I hated that summer!

  8. Xim says:

    “Quick! GO GET THE SHOTGUN!!!” hehe, I don’t really have a yard of mine own

  9. lilwhytwch says:

    ? why not just leave it there and pretend its a tree?

  10. Calthin says:

    (yawns) I can procrastinate better than he can.

  11. Keith says:

    He could build a tree house. Or, say he’s gonna build a tree house in a few minutes, after all the good shows are over.

  12. Colin says:

    I thought it was for his hair at first, but then i realized that his hair is probably the source of his invulnerablility

  13. IronDino says:

    He must of left the yardword for quite some time for the weeds to evolve bark to produce on their sides. Unless of course its a tree…

  14. redbullrocks says:

    well, i had to pull weeds on summer. there was a ‘weed’ that was about 4 inches tall in the garden that had just been moved over every now and then for the last 5-6 years. that ‘weed’ turned out to be an oak tree that had been moved over so many times that the roots were 6-7′ long. true story.
    and yes, i dug/pulled the whole thing out. it was a trophy for a while… a very short while, but a while none the less.

  15. zantarath says:

    Colin, what hair?

  16. Tehblues says:

    I had that happen once. We had a weed about seven feet tall on the side of our house… Yeah

  17. The Wiseone says:

    That’s gotta be one HELL of a dandelion.

  18. Ben says:

    I can just hear biff thinking, “where do i start first?”

  19. Konola says:

    “That’s going to be me one day.”

  20. Mint Sharpie says:

    Oh geez, one time there was one of those little shrubs growing by our stream, right? Weeelllll we didn’t really think about it…. next thing we know it’s TEN FEET TALL and I had to cut it down with my sword. My hands did not appreciate this. >_

    1. Arcan says:

      How many Rupees did it give you?

  21. Darkpheonix XIII says:

    Awww, I want a sword.
    My goal is for my house to become a tree, it sits there for so long.

  22. DemonRex says:

    He’ll probably try and whittle it to a stump with those tiny things.

  23. Changeling says:

    heh. our yard gets like that when the tractor is broken (which is all the time)… well, maybe not _that_ bad. but untill the lawn was mowed yesterday, the grass was aproaching shoulder hright, in places…

  24. Knife Knut says:

    Swords are the wrong tool to cut down trees!!!!!!!!
    If you have to use something swordlike, use a machete.

  25. Hoboapple says:

    He should get the tree to sit in his recliner. That would chop it!

  26. Garrett says:

    I actually do have weeds like that. They seem to like to grow right next to the house. My mom sometimes tells me to go mow the walnut trees. They sprout up too often.

  27. Super Llama says:


  28. Super Llama says:

    Also, have you ever had to pull a giant weed as tall as you are, with bristly, throny crap covering every square centimeter of it’s being? Not a pleasant experience.

  29. Melindotty says:

    That actually happened to me. I thought it was a small tree, and my mom informed me that it was a weed and my job to get rid of it with the only tool we had….

    kitchen sheers.

  30. Paperclip. says:

    This one’s actually happened to me, too. Ever seen a three inch thick poison ivy vine?

  31. Bari says:

    I basically live in a forest-like-place, and in our back yard we have trees like that. They’re so freaking tall it’s maddening.
    It’s almost scary to think that they’re actually weeds…

  32. Chester says:


  33. Capn Steve says:

    Besides, everyone knows that the proper tool for tree cutting is Carp.

  34. the Scarf says:

    PaChah! Herring works better.

  35. herc says:

    Changeling, if the grass was shoulder high you should have just baled it. My dad intentionally lets our yard grow high in the spring and we get two to four round bales out of it depending on the weather. The cows appreciate it.

  36. Kitsunie says:

    I love how disgruntled he looks here.

  37. Lunatika says:

    Knife knut, A very sharp machete

  38. Torg says:

    Lunatika, A sharp machete, yes, but a machete is the most effective sword-like thing for hacking.

    I agree with the Scarf, but in my experience marlin is by far the best fish to chop down a tree with.
    Now tell me: how much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

  39. diesel says:

    lmao, looks like my next door neighbor, lol

  40. solar says:

    im supised hed not useing his flaming hammer

  41. Deteramot says:

    Here in Colorado, we call those trees. Weeds are the ones that don’t get that big.

  42. Soltueur says:

    A) Say they are trees and leave them be

    B) get a chainsaw and get rid of them

    A would be safer, but since we’re talking about Biff…

  43. Lt_amazil says:

    Woof (bad pun of the day)

  44. Howls Like Wolf says:

    Technically, a weed is any plant that is in a place where it is not supposed to be.

  45. Tordoc says:

    *sigh* This has happended to me 🙁

  46. chrisleech says:

    @Torg As much wood as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.

    Or so the government says.

  47. BrainpanSonata says:

    My back yard used to be like this… I had to pay the professional gardeners extra to clear it up.

  48. Hunter says:

    Those are not hills in the background, those are the untrimmed shrubs.

  49. Jenny Creed says:

    Don’t worry, Biff. Its bark is worse than its bite.

    1. extremist343 says:

      In this case that may very well be the problem!

  50. danhayman2017 says:


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