It’s good that the vending machine doesn’t have a little LCD face that needs to shyly look away as it it doesn’t know I was here 6 times today already. “Oh I’m sorry sir I seem to be fresh out of Crinkle Crunch bars. They have been a really popular item… uh… today… well ever since you started working here really. Not that I’ve been keeping track or anything! I’ll uh… mention to my supplier that we should probably double up on them from now on. Have you tried the Nutty Nougat roll? (I ask as if I don’t know the answer.) Oh sorry sir! That last part wasn’t supposed to be out loud! Stop hitting my coin return lever! You didn’t put any money in yet!”

Today’s Maximumble features barking dogs.