#979 – Clipped
Posted on March 12, 2010 at 12:00 am by Chris
Chapter: Comics
Sometimes ice cubes like to play tricks on kids. On a blazing hot summer day I would come in from my daily tree climbing expedition to get myself a giant glass of ice water. Throw a pile of ice cubes into the glass and then fill it to the top with thirst quenching goodness. Secretly, the ice cubes have fused together and cling to the bottom of the glass waiting to strike. Halfway through my first swallow the ice berg releases to simultaneously stab my nose with a sharp cube corner and spill water down the front of my shirt.
Also, come see me at the Emerald City ComiCon this weekend!
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biff is in a great place to mess with people’s ice cubes. he could totally do stuff like freezing fake flies in them. 🙂 unless he’s just the one who makes the ice into cubes, in which case he’d be limited to carving the ice in to more creative shapes… like maybe someone’s face?
that story reminds me of a Demetri Martin joke. hold hold… now!
If I were rich, I would employ an ice cuber. His only job would be to carve small ice cubes from larger ones for my enjoyment. While wearing a fedora.
@TwiztedMessiah: … a fedora? Everyone knows it’s the Tilley which reigns supreme in the world of hats. Name another hat that can be eaten by an elephant… several times… and come out smiling.
No, the hat of hats is the WW1 aviator cap, fleece lined and complete with goggles and silk scarf. And I so totally own a set. As for carving the cubes into shapes, hasn’t Biff already done so? Isn’t that one of the blockheads from Gumby?
Sorry, all. Porkpie hat wins. Mmm… pork pie….
@ ladyamethyst83: Sounds like a half-joke to me. Did I miss something, or is it perfectly normal for me to still be waiting for the set-up?
Today’s story does sound similar to that Demetri Martin joke. Let’s face it, we all encounter the “ice attacking you” problem sooner or later.
If he only carves the ice, he could do the Jesus faces on them to make people think god is telling them something. Or use a couple of hairs to put his face on there. The hair is for his eyebrows.
So I’m supposing this is “working for various companies while wearing round hats week”? Then again, there was no hat involved in the Wallingdale’s escapade.
i finaly caught up with the comics
this ultimate hat debate a few comments up? easily solved. go back through the archives. steam powered thinking cap. that wins hands down.
I do believe that king of hats depends on who is wearing it. Be what it may for the rest of the world, the fedora goes best on my Croatian ice cuber. And I don’t wear hats, as I like to dye my hair unnatural colors, and it doesn’t get along with hats.
ha, i had a great experience with an ice cube a few weeks ago, i had to numb my ear with ice so i could pierce it, and it got stuck to my ear, and it hurt
@ moradin: so did I! 🙂
He’s melting the ice with his fingers. A professional ice cuber would never do that.
Name that tool! Caliper!
Actually, some of the higher end bars around here DO do that, or similar.
I know of a few places that now buy their ice in huge blocks, and saw it to shape. It’s sawn to different shapes and granularities for different drinks: whiskey on the rocks is served over a single large cube; shaken drinks are done with four smaller cubes; ice is cracked for some drinks, and crushed for others — to order, at the time that the drink is made.
It makes a difference. And, yes, it is considered very important to attempt to get the cubes truly cubical.